1 Month Post Surgery

It's been a while since I posted to my blog - and for good reason: things have been going down hill the past two weeks and only now just beginning to see the light.

It all started two weeks ago on Monday. I suddenly felt extreme shallowness in breathing and experienced a constant pulse rate of 130-140. It happened almost instantaneous and I don't think it was because of anything I did. I thought I was going to faint! We went straight for the emergency room and AMAZINGLY didn't wait one minute before they took me in (my previous experiences with ERs usually take 4-8 hours to be seen). They had me do lots of tests which involved having a CT scan since one of the doctors thought that I could have a clot in my lung. Good thing that was not the case. Then they were beginning to think that it may be too much fluid around my heart which is causing constrictions around my heart muscle making it beat faster. Then the order for EKGs and an echocardiogram. I was admitted to the hospital for a few days then was discharged.

Several days after things did not improve and so I went back to the ER with the same symptoms - high pulse rate and fast, shallow breathing. I was seen right away by the ER team. I didn't get admitted this time, but just had more tests performed at the ER. I also had another echocardiogram - the problem was that it took the guy over 6 hours to come over to do the test. It turned out that he was at home sleeping and not listing to his pager.

Then just yesterdsay - still feeling quite crappy and now with severe coughs because of pneumonia - I went to my cardiologist for my appointment. He right away told me that I had to go to the emergency room and get myself admitted to the hospital. So I got a ride on the medical transport system (my first time being in an ambulance) to the ER. More tests an another echocardiogram. Lots of doctors are now starting to be concerned with the fluid around my heart, but the attending doctor of my case - which happens to be my surgeon, said that it is of no concern right now. Whew! This saves me from another operation to drain that fluid.

So right now I'm in the hospital resting and getting antibiotics for my pneumonia as well as getting my regular tube feedings. I'm also now just starting to eat regular food. Hospital food doesn't taste too bad if you haven't eaten in a while.

I just want to also thank everyone at Tandberg for their emails of support and cards and gifts form my old pals at UCSD! Thanks for the quilt, Trish! It looks beautiful. =)

...and thanks Eric for caring so such.

Two Weeks Post Surgery

Things are going “OK” for the most part. I’ve been taking it really easy the last few weeks relaxing on my massage chair most of the day and walking down the hallways of my apartment every now and then. I don’t tend to get as tired and out of breath as before, which is good, but I still find it uncomfortable to walk – I feel ‘tightness’ around my abdomen (because of the incisions) so I tend to walk slow while leaning forward. There are other annoying inconveniences I have to deal with. For one, I’m chained to my feeding machine most of the day – 18 hours out of the day; and it’s so noisy that I have to wear ear plugs when I sleep! The worst part so far is that I’ve partially lost my voice (every time I try talking I feel like coughing). How I managed to phone my insurance, talk with EDD, talk to my doctors, and setup appointments is a near miracle. Pain is the other thing I have to deal with. The first two weeks I had no problem with pain, but just this week I started to feel pain around my abdominal incisions. I’m taking vicodin which helps.

One bit of good news is that I finally got my Jackson-Pratt drain removed from my neck after my surgeon finally cleared me to start a liquid diet by mouth. I can finally start drinking water!! Yay! It feels great to finally get to taste food again, albeit liquid. By Monday I should be able to start soft-solid foods! So far swallowing liquids isn’t any different than before surgery. I’ll let you all know how it goes with solid foods.

I also received final news on the pathology report of my esophagus. The tumor went through all layers of the esophagus but was shrunk to within the walls by chemo-radiation. Preliminary results which I received last week noted no lymph nodes affected, but further tests showed that one lymph node had cancer in it. All margins were clear so they’re pretty confident that they got everything. Now all I need to worry about is a re-occurance.

1 Week Post Surgery

I finally got to go home yesterday. In all, I stayed at the hospital for a total of 6 day – not bad at all considering what I’ve been though.

Things have improved little in the last few days – I still feel weak, not being able to breathe as deeply as before, neck ache, abdominal pain when I cough, muscle atrophy, throat pain when I swallow my saliva. In all, it feels like I’ve been run-over.

But things are going as expected, I guess. Its just really, really rough right now.

They currently have me on tube feedings through my j-tube almost all of the day. I have an appointment next week for them to determine if there are any leaks when I swallow liquids. If that goes ok then I’ll go on a liquid diet for several days then to soft foods after that. I’ll gradually lower my tube feedings when I take on more food by mouth

- total of 9 incisions (2 1-inch side incisions for chest tubes, 5 0.5-inch port incisions, 2 4-inch incisions one in the neck and the other in the abdomen).



Before....



.... and after.



This is my esophagus that they removed with 25% of my stomach. Sorry if this grosses anyone out.

3rd Day Post Surgery

It’s very unpleasant as I write this so I’ll make it quick. The operation was a success and I’m still alive. It took 10 hours in all – unlike the 4 hours I was told before-hand. I don’t remember all that much anymore of the surgery including the day after so I can’t comment much. The last few days, however, have been extremely tough. There wasn’t nearly as much pain as I expected – its been really well taken care of to where its nearly a non-issue. The biggest problem I currently face, though is breathing problems. It seems as though I can’t expand my lungs enough to take a full breath.

All Is well

...few minutes later: now they tell me everything is OK. I'm all cleared with my insurance company. Yay!

....now I'm at the pre-op room and changed into the hospital gown. Oh how I love to wear these hospital gowns (being sarcastic).

Slight Mishap

It is currently 5:15 near the admissions office at the UCLA hospital. Apparently when I arrived here they told me they have not yet cleared the surgery with my insurance company and that the secretary working on the case wouldn't come in until 9am. Ack!

The mix-up could have happened because I switched my schedule to an earlier time (my awesome surgeon called me up personally and asked me if I wanted an earlier time since his other patient canceled). I guess the other people didn't know about the time change.

Last Posting Before Surgery

I've just finished my last set of pre-ops and I'm all set tomorrow morning for my surgery. Everything went well for my endoscopic ultrasound - my gastroenterologist says there was no endoscopic evidence of the tumor, which is good news and what I was expecting.

I also had a meeting with my clinical coordinator discussing the procedure in detail and what to expect before and after surgery. I must say the details of the aftermath of surgery were very disturbing for me and I'm still in shock that I'll be going through with this. For one thing, I didn't know that I'll have a drainage tube coming out of my neck for over a week! WTF!? I imagine there will be at least 3 more drainage tubes coming out of me and that I'll also be connected to a bag of liquid nutrition through my j-tube for 20 hours out of the day for a week. F**k! Oh yeah, and probably the worst part is another tube through my urethra going into my bladder! ACK! That's gonna hurt for sure!

Shit! Shit! Shit! I can't belive I'm actually going through with this!

I fucking hate cancer! Damn! This is so unfair! AHHHHRG! Shit! ....ok, I just had to vent of some anger.

Anyways, my surgery will start early tomorrow morning around 8am or so but I have to get to the hospital by 5am. I'll try to update my blog as soon as I'm capable of doing so after waking up... which will probably be a day after surgery.

Wish me luck!