To all who knew Joe and/or have admired his strength and bravery:
Thank you for all of your support and love, but unfortunately Joe will no longer be updating his Blog. After an arduous and insurmountable battle, Joe has claimed his reward in heaven.
Though Joe may live in our hearts, he will be truly missed. Be joyful for he has found true happiness in his new life.
For more information, please contact his sister Sarah at sjesena@gmail.com. Also, please mention how you knew Joe. With sincere thanks.
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Friday, September 26, 2008
Oh, The Agony
It was NOTHING like the two thorasentesis I had before. The pain after the procedure would normally wear off within 2-4 hours, but this has so far lasted past 12 hours and at a higher pain grade. To top it all off, I ran out of my primary pain medication and was a huge hassle to get another bottle.
As for taking video of the procedure, we did, until one of the medical directors came in and confiscated my SD card. Apparently, the management wants to know before you start filming anything in the hospital. I deleted the video files just for that day - since that's what I excepted him to do anyways, but to also relieve some fault of responsibility to the nurses and the doctor that allowed us to film it. It was some really awesome footage of the best very high-tech procedure rooms I've ever seen. This was at UCLA's new Ronald Regan hospital.
A little over a litter was removed again, but this time through the new catheter. This now makes 3 implants in my body.
And did I mention it HURT?!?! The majority of my left side hurts and also whenever I take in a deep breathe - I can feel the pain coming from my insides.
I was told that I have to drain the plural space everyday for a couple weeks or so...and hopefully it'll be much better at that point.
I guess one good thing that happened today is my purchase of Crysis Warhead - a computer game that I've been waiting for for quite a while. My next "absolute-must-have" game would be "StarCraft II" which should hopefully be released by years' end.
As for taking video of the procedure, we did, until one of the medical directors came in and confiscated my SD card. Apparently, the management wants to know before you start filming anything in the hospital. I deleted the video files just for that day - since that's what I excepted him to do anyways, but to also relieve some fault of responsibility to the nurses and the doctor that allowed us to film it. It was some really awesome footage of the best very high-tech procedure rooms I've ever seen. This was at UCLA's new Ronald Regan hospital.
A little over a litter was removed again, but this time through the new catheter. This now makes 3 implants in my body.
And did I mention it HURT?!?! The majority of my left side hurts and also whenever I take in a deep breathe - I can feel the pain coming from my insides.
I was told that I have to drain the plural space everyday for a couple weeks or so...and hopefully it'll be much better at that point.
I guess one good thing that happened today is my purchase of Crysis Warhead - a computer game that I've been waiting for for quite a while. My next "absolute-must-have" game would be "StarCraft II" which should hopefully be released by years' end.
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Getting Another Catheter Installed
Tomorrow I'll have a Pleurx Catheter installed for me to easily drain the fluid around my lungs. It's similar to the way they do the a thorancentesis, but it requires a different kind of doctor.
While I'm getting the procedure, they're going to drain another 1000cc of fluid that has accumulated since my last thorancentesis - that's about 2750cc of fluid so far!
I actually had about 4 or 5 choices to deal with the fluid build-up - one would have involved not-so-minor surgery, which I did not want. Going the catheter route seemed the easiest and less painful method.
While I'm getting the procedure, they're going to drain another 1000cc of fluid that has accumulated since my last thorancentesis - that's about 2750cc of fluid so far!
I actually had about 4 or 5 choices to deal with the fluid build-up - one would have involved not-so-minor surgery, which I did not want. Going the catheter route seemed the easiest and less painful method.
Sunday, September 21, 2008
After The Procedure
The procedure went better than last time - not as painful. The worst part before was the sudden evacuation of the fluid which caused a painful pressure differential. This time I told them to do it very slowly, for my lungs to get used to it.
The total amount of fluid removed was 1000cc. Two weeks ago it was 750cc. If fluid keeps collecting, I just might need to get a catheter that I can drain myself.
If you want to see the actual procedure done on me, check this link out. It was taken by my Hi-Def camera, but obviously YouTube has certain bandwidth constrains so quality is just "OK".
The total amount of fluid removed was 1000cc. Two weeks ago it was 750cc. If fluid keeps collecting, I just might need to get a catheter that I can drain myself.
If you want to see the actual procedure done on me, check this link out. It was taken by my Hi-Def camera, but obviously YouTube has certain bandwidth constrains so quality is just "OK".
Thursday, September 18, 2008
ACk! Not Again!!!
Had another chest x-ray today at my weekly doctor's appointment for the clinical study that I'm in. It revealed even more fluid around my lungs than last time. I have an appointment for tomorrow for another thoracentesis. My oncologist thinks that this may happen again so he suggested that I get a semi-permanent catheter installed for me to drain the fluid myself. This will be done probably next week. All this is most-likely due to the cancer that has spread around my lungs.
The endoscopy that I had a few days ago went OK - everything looked basically normal from what the gastroenterologist could see.
I'll try and take my own video of the procedure (in High Def!) if they'll let me.
Here's a good resource that I found.
The endoscopy that I had a few days ago went OK - everything looked basically normal from what the gastroenterologist could see.
I'll try and take my own video of the procedure (in High Def!) if they'll let me.
Here's a good resource that I found.
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
What's On My Desktop
Or rather, what's my desktop background?
This is currently my desktop background - character images from the game FFXI Online. I stole some images from another wallpaper but the two Red Mage images are direct game renderings of my own character. The complete Red Mage "Artifact Armor" Relic Set (sometimes called AF2 gear) took over a year to get and its one of the best armor sets in the game for the "Red Mage" job/class.
The desktop that I have at work shows a picture of the starship Enterprise NCC-1701-D; the one used in ST: TNG.
I've also had background images of Gixxer bikes before I bought the real thing. And let me tell you, it looks much better sitting in my garage than on display on my desktop.
This is currently my desktop background - character images from the game FFXI Online. I stole some images from another wallpaper but the two Red Mage images are direct game renderings of my own character. The complete Red Mage "Artifact Armor" Relic Set (sometimes called AF2 gear) took over a year to get and its one of the best armor sets in the game for the "Red Mage" job/class.
The desktop that I have at work shows a picture of the starship Enterprise NCC-1701-D; the one used in ST: TNG.
I've also had background images of Gixxer bikes before I bought the real thing. And let me tell you, it looks much better sitting in my garage than on display on my desktop.
Joe's New Tech Toy
I finally came to my senses and bought myself a Canon HF10 Camcorder. This thing captures both picture and video in AVC H.264 at 1080i! Wonderful high definition clarity! It arrived last week and have been playing around with it for some time.
I took some sample shots of me on my bike by the use of a newly purchased camcorder mount for sport-bikes. The one thing that I over-looked was that my windshield was smoked - and so that would mean the video would be darkened and distorted. You'll just have to see it [here] to see how bad it looks.
I also have a video of before and after of my recent endoscopy (they wouldn't let me actually take video of the procedure).
note: I'll be uploading the videos soon...
I took some sample shots of me on my bike by the use of a newly purchased camcorder mount for sport-bikes. The one thing that I over-looked was that my windshield was smoked - and so that would mean the video would be darkened and distorted. You'll just have to see it [here] to see how bad it looks.
I also have a video of before and after of my recent endoscopy (they wouldn't let me actually take video of the procedure).
note: I'll be uploading the videos soon...
Friday, September 12, 2008
Dinner With The BBTV Team
One of our talented Software Engineer - Miguel (the guy in the right rear of the picture). Decided to leave TandbergTV ("Part of the Ericsson Group"). This was just a celebration in his honor for all the hard work he's done. He's been there from the very start of Zetools (the company I used to work for) and on through with the 3 company acquisitions.
Two people who are not in the picture, but still part of the "Broadband Television Team" are: Joe Franzetta and Brian Ring.
Honerable mentions go to Qing Li and Kelly Taylor who used to be part of the BBTV software engineering team.
Come visit us often for lunch, Miguel...... =)
Two people who are not in the picture, but still part of the "Broadband Television Team" are: Joe Franzetta and Brian Ring.
Honerable mentions go to Qing Li and Kelly Taylor who used to be part of the BBTV software engineering team.
Come visit us often for lunch, Miguel...... =)
Friday, September 5, 2008
Thoracentesis
This is the procedure for removing fluid from the pleural space due to a pleural effusion. (I'm beginning to feel like a real doctor, lol)
I just had mine just a few hours ago. After prepping the surface of my back, they injected some numbing medication - lidocaine - in between some ribs where they would insert the catheter. In goes the catheter and ending up in the pleural space. They used an ultrasound machine to know exactly where the catheter is at in any moment. Then they start draining the fluid; first into 4 or 5 test tubes then to a large glass bottle to hold the rest. Total volume of liquid removed? 800ml! Yes, that's almost the same amount in a coke bottle! I could not believe it.
How did it feel? The insertion of the catheter and initial needle poke was NOTHING compared to the pain I felt a few minutes into the fluid being removed. As the fluid is being extracted, it creates a vacuum in the pleural space since there is nothing to replace the space that was being taken up by the fluid. I felt like I couldn't breathe, and felt that my lungs were being sucked in from the inside. That hurt so much, but it really would depend on how much fluid that was removed. It would take a few hours or so till my insides stretch out so that I wouldn't feel any pain.
Next, they're going to analyze the fluid to see what exactly it is and hopefully come up with a diagnosis on what caused this.
800mL! Geeez!
If you want to see what it looks like, click here. This is another guy getting the same procedure.
I just had mine just a few hours ago. After prepping the surface of my back, they injected some numbing medication - lidocaine - in between some ribs where they would insert the catheter. In goes the catheter and ending up in the pleural space. They used an ultrasound machine to know exactly where the catheter is at in any moment. Then they start draining the fluid; first into 4 or 5 test tubes then to a large glass bottle to hold the rest. Total volume of liquid removed? 800ml! Yes, that's almost the same amount in a coke bottle! I could not believe it.
How did it feel? The insertion of the catheter and initial needle poke was NOTHING compared to the pain I felt a few minutes into the fluid being removed. As the fluid is being extracted, it creates a vacuum in the pleural space since there is nothing to replace the space that was being taken up by the fluid. I felt like I couldn't breathe, and felt that my lungs were being sucked in from the inside. That hurt so much, but it really would depend on how much fluid that was removed. It would take a few hours or so till my insides stretch out so that I wouldn't feel any pain.
Next, they're going to analyze the fluid to see what exactly it is and hopefully come up with a diagnosis on what caused this.
800mL! Geeez!
If you want to see what it looks like, click here. This is another guy getting the same procedure.
Thursday, September 4, 2008
First Day Of New Treatment
I showed up for my first day of treatment - a phase 2 clinical trial meant for gastric cancer. Its in a pill form - of which I have to take 4 a day everyday for the next month or so.
Since this is a trial, I have to undergo several tests - unrine, blood, blood pressure, EKG, weight, etc... pretty frequently. I also have to keep a small diary of the medications I take, the time and date, and the side effects that happen.
I told my oncologist that I've lately been feeling tired and short of breath so he had be do a chest x-ray just to make sure everything was ok. To my surprise, there was a substantial amount of fluid around my lungs. I'm scheduled to have the fluid removed tomorrow. How you may ask they would do this? With a big long needle, of course! =0(
Since this is a trial, I have to undergo several tests - unrine, blood, blood pressure, EKG, weight, etc... pretty frequently. I also have to keep a small diary of the medications I take, the time and date, and the side effects that happen.
I told my oncologist that I've lately been feeling tired and short of breath so he had be do a chest x-ray just to make sure everything was ok. To my surprise, there was a substantial amount of fluid around my lungs. I'm scheduled to have the fluid removed tomorrow. How you may ask they would do this? With a big long needle, of course! =0(
Wednesday, September 3, 2008
Stand Up To Cancer
Mark your calendars because this Friday (Sept 5) at 8PM PT/ET there is the "Stand Up To Cancer" 2-hour telethon on all major networks.
Stand Up To Cancer
More than 60 celebrities will participate in Stand Up to Cancer, a live fund- and awareness-raising television special that will air simultaneously on ABC, NBC and CBS.
Jessica Alba, Halle Berry, Jack Black, Sheryl Crow, Ellen DeGeneres, Jennifer Garner, Diane Keaton, Rob Lowe, Sharon Osbourne, Keanu Reeves and Carrie Underwood are among the stars set to appear, it was announced Wednesday.
They'll join previously announced participants including Salma Hayek, Scarlett Johansson, Lance Armstrong, America Ferrera, Meryl Streep, Charlize Theron and Forest Whitaker.
The celebrities, along with network news anchors Katie Couric, Charles Gibson and Brian Williams, will deliver an evening of "edutainment," said executive producer Laura Ziskin, a cancer survivor who helped establish the event and the nonprofit group behind it.
Stand Up To Cancer
More than 60 celebrities will participate in Stand Up to Cancer, a live fund- and awareness-raising television special that will air simultaneously on ABC, NBC and CBS.
Jessica Alba, Halle Berry, Jack Black, Sheryl Crow, Ellen DeGeneres, Jennifer Garner, Diane Keaton, Rob Lowe, Sharon Osbourne, Keanu Reeves and Carrie Underwood are among the stars set to appear, it was announced Wednesday.
They'll join previously announced participants including Salma Hayek, Scarlett Johansson, Lance Armstrong, America Ferrera, Meryl Streep, Charlize Theron and Forest Whitaker.
The celebrities, along with network news anchors Katie Couric, Charles Gibson and Brian Williams, will deliver an evening of "edutainment," said executive producer Laura Ziskin, a cancer survivor who helped establish the event and the nonprofit group behind it.
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Confessions on...
...cheating the system.
It has been a very long and important interest of mine to experiment with and to create an artificial intelligence. I remember way back when I was about 14 or so I created a very primitive simulation of A.I. All it did was transform the input into a question. So for example if you gave the stimulus request of "I love to run", it might provide the response of "Why do you love to run?" Or if given "Are you a human or a computer", it might respond with "Why do you think I'm a human or a computer". Of course, this technique does not work in all instances. But it does the trick a good portion of the time.
Alan Turing, a leading computer scientist in his day (some say he actually created the discipline), poised a question that went something like this: "if you are, as a human, unable to determine if you are chatting online with another person or with a machine, and if you really were chatting with a machine, would that machine be then said to have consciousness and to think?" So called is the test named after him - the "Turing Test" (all computer science grads know what this is; if you are one and didn't know, shame on you). A machine is said to pass the Turing test (to have intelligence) if it can fool a human into thinking it was another human just by chatting with him/her. So in a way, he began the foundations of Artificial Intelligence.
Combining my interest in online gaming, specifically FFXI, AI, and my somewhat lazy nature, I decided to create a "bot" that would do the dull and repetitious tasks in the game. I made a bot that would kill mobs (monsters) to gain experience points as a way of "leveling up." I actually started botting in the game 2 years ago but interest dropped and then there was cancer. I've recently gotten back into it and the game as a way to keep myself busy.
Just recently I've made another bot that would transport players to other parts of the virtual world - for in-game money in exchange. A big problem to this type of bot is that it requires a lot of interaction with other players. People consider it cheating and is against the terms-of-use agreement of the game. If you're caught you could be reported to a GM (Game Master - law enforcers in the game world; in FFXI, they are hired by the company) and could possibly have the ban hammer dropped on you. So, it should be quite obvious to have a need of a good AI. Enter the world of online chatbots - bots available online for your chatting amusements (did you know that there is a "God" bot? Truly makes for some interesting confessions I would think). One of the most famous chatbot is ALICE. It has won the Loebner Prize several times over in the past and developed by Dr. Wallace who also developed AIML (dialect of XML containing LOTS of stimulus-response pairs). A site which hosts AIML files and makes available a web-service for processing chat requests, Pandorabots.com, was the key to my FFXI AI bot. A lot of time was spent on modifying the default set of chat requests and responses to contour to the lingo of the game. But not only that, the default set simulates an intelligent robot - and I wanted a simulation of an intelligent person. So if you were to ask it "Are you a real person?", it would respond with "No, I'm a real robot." This actually did happen in-game during testing of my bot. Fortunately for me, the other player thought it was being sarcastic and she responded with "was just checking sorry." I thought that was VERY funny. LOL. I keep modifying the AIML files whenever an inappropriate response is given. It's getting "smarter."
As far as I know, I'm the first person to integrate an external AI entity pretending to be a real person in an online virtual game that interacts with other online players (and that works decently). Most (if not all) of the bots in existence do not interact with other players; in fact, they avoid other players to avoid from getting caught. I eventually plan to confess my botting to a popular FFXI site, just hoping to get famous...or infamous (LOL) before I die. I hope word would then spread to other gaming sites that things like this is possible and is happening. I totally understand that dispersing this knowledge would initially have severe in-game social and financial consequences as more and more people would be doing this (can you say inflation?). How cool would it be to be the one responsible for single-handedly simultaneously crashing the financial markets of multiple virtual worlds?!?! My account would probably be canceled. And I imagine this idea would spread to other games. So I have to apologize to some friends and a cousin of mine who already play another MMORPG - "sorry to ruin the game for ya." LOL.
But seriously, I think it is a good thing in the long run. I believe it will spur innovations in online gaming AI and the AI community in general. Imagine playing an online game with a bunch of intelligent bots and not even know it! I predict that this will become reality in the not-too-distant future. It's like THE classic sci-fi film "Bladerunner" but in a virtual game world. Instead of the 'bladerunners,' you got the GMs to worry about. How would you be able to tell the bots apart from the real thing?
Go ahead and ponder on this for a moment. In the mean time, I'll continue on making virtual money while I sleep. LOL.
Now this is the ultimate application of the Turing test!
If you want to chat with my bot, you can go here. Go wild! =)
... be forewarned, the site keeps a log of your chatting!! And I can see them (but not from who, though)! LOL.
Edit: Ok, someone beat me to it: http://sl-devcorner.blogspot.com/2007/04/second-life-alice-bot-chat.html. Oh well.
It has been a very long and important interest of mine to experiment with and to create an artificial intelligence. I remember way back when I was about 14 or so I created a very primitive simulation of A.I. All it did was transform the input into a question. So for example if you gave the stimulus request of "I love to run", it might provide the response of "Why do you love to run?" Or if given "Are you a human or a computer", it might respond with "Why do you think I'm a human or a computer". Of course, this technique does not work in all instances. But it does the trick a good portion of the time.
Alan Turing, a leading computer scientist in his day (some say he actually created the discipline), poised a question that went something like this: "if you are, as a human, unable to determine if you are chatting online with another person or with a machine, and if you really were chatting with a machine, would that machine be then said to have consciousness and to think?" So called is the test named after him - the "Turing Test" (all computer science grads know what this is; if you are one and didn't know, shame on you). A machine is said to pass the Turing test (to have intelligence) if it can fool a human into thinking it was another human just by chatting with him/her. So in a way, he began the foundations of Artificial Intelligence.
Combining my interest in online gaming, specifically FFXI, AI, and my somewhat lazy nature, I decided to create a "bot" that would do the dull and repetitious tasks in the game. I made a bot that would kill mobs (monsters) to gain experience points as a way of "leveling up." I actually started botting in the game 2 years ago but interest dropped and then there was cancer. I've recently gotten back into it and the game as a way to keep myself busy.
Just recently I've made another bot that would transport players to other parts of the virtual world - for in-game money in exchange. A big problem to this type of bot is that it requires a lot of interaction with other players. People consider it cheating and is against the terms-of-use agreement of the game. If you're caught you could be reported to a GM (Game Master - law enforcers in the game world; in FFXI, they are hired by the company) and could possibly have the ban hammer dropped on you. So, it should be quite obvious to have a need of a good AI. Enter the world of online chatbots - bots available online for your chatting amusements (did you know that there is a "God" bot? Truly makes for some interesting confessions I would think). One of the most famous chatbot is ALICE. It has won the Loebner Prize several times over in the past and developed by Dr. Wallace who also developed AIML (dialect of XML containing LOTS of stimulus-response pairs). A site which hosts AIML files and makes available a web-service for processing chat requests, Pandorabots.com, was the key to my FFXI AI bot. A lot of time was spent on modifying the default set of chat requests and responses to contour to the lingo of the game. But not only that, the default set simulates an intelligent robot - and I wanted a simulation of an intelligent person. So if you were to ask it "Are you a real person?", it would respond with "No, I'm a real robot." This actually did happen in-game during testing of my bot. Fortunately for me, the other player thought it was being sarcastic and she responded with "was just checking sorry." I thought that was VERY funny. LOL. I keep modifying the AIML files whenever an inappropriate response is given. It's getting "smarter."
As far as I know, I'm the first person to integrate an external AI entity pretending to be a real person in an online virtual game that interacts with other online players (and that works decently). Most (if not all) of the bots in existence do not interact with other players; in fact, they avoid other players to avoid from getting caught. I eventually plan to confess my botting to a popular FFXI site, just hoping to get famous...or infamous (LOL) before I die. I hope word would then spread to other gaming sites that things like this is possible and is happening. I totally understand that dispersing this knowledge would initially have severe in-game social and financial consequences as more and more people would be doing this (can you say inflation?). How cool would it be to be the one responsible for single-handedly simultaneously crashing the financial markets of multiple virtual worlds?!?! My account would probably be canceled. And I imagine this idea would spread to other games. So I have to apologize to some friends and a cousin of mine who already play another MMORPG - "sorry to ruin the game for ya." LOL.
But seriously, I think it is a good thing in the long run. I believe it will spur innovations in online gaming AI and the AI community in general. Imagine playing an online game with a bunch of intelligent bots and not even know it! I predict that this will become reality in the not-too-distant future. It's like THE classic sci-fi film "Bladerunner" but in a virtual game world. Instead of the 'bladerunners,' you got the GMs to worry about. How would you be able to tell the bots apart from the real thing?
Go ahead and ponder on this for a moment. In the mean time, I'll continue on making virtual money while I sleep. LOL.
Now this is the ultimate application of the Turing test!
If you want to chat with my bot, you can go here. Go wild! =)
... be forewarned, the site keeps a log of your chatting!! And I can see them (but not from who, though)! LOL.
Edit: Ok, someone beat me to it: http://sl-devcorner.blogspot.com/2007/04/second-life-alice-bot-chat.html. Oh well.
Fun And Amusement
For a break from the regular news...
I was just watching the History channel just this morning and they had a piece on the evolution of the digestive system. How interesting, I thought. But what really knocked my socks off (if I had them on to begin with), was a machine that emulated the digestion process of a human - from start to, uh, ... end. They call it 'cloaca' and is considered (really) as a piece of art. So of course I just had to research more about this machine on google, just for the "how do they do it" answer, of course. LOL.
I came upon a website - I kid you not - www.poopreport.com. Boy did I get a laugh out of that. What was even better was their article of cloaca. The author is funny as he is articulate. A must read. =). Also read the comments - they're hilarious as heck.
Next, I came upon a you-tube video. Now this REALLY takes the cake. LOL. It sure made my day.
I hope you had a good laugh. I sure did.
I was just watching the History channel just this morning and they had a piece on the evolution of the digestive system. How interesting, I thought. But what really knocked my socks off (if I had them on to begin with), was a machine that emulated the digestion process of a human - from start to, uh, ... end. They call it 'cloaca' and is considered (really) as a piece of art. So of course I just had to research more about this machine on google, just for the "how do they do it" answer, of course. LOL.
I came upon a website - I kid you not - www.poopreport.com. Boy did I get a laugh out of that. What was even better was their article of cloaca. The author is funny as he is articulate. A must read. =). Also read the comments - they're hilarious as heck.
Next, I came upon a you-tube video. Now this REALLY takes the cake. LOL. It sure made my day.
I hope you had a good laugh. I sure did.
Thursday, August 21, 2008
New Treatment Protocol
I had two options for treatment: go on a phase 2 clinical study of a drug, or more chemo. My Onc recommended the phase 2 clinical trial (it was his study). He said that if that did not work that I can continue on with chemo but that I just couldn't take the clinical drug later on if I decide on not doing it now.
The drug doesn't have a name but has a code of GSk1363089 (XL880) - administered orally to subjects with metastatic gastric cancer. It is designed to inhibit the growth of blood vessels in tumors. It is hoped that by limiting the tumor's blood supply, we can limit the growth of the cancer cells. It is not approved by the FDA.
So that's it. I have to take this drug once a day for 2 months. They say it will have limited side affects (mainly tiredness and diarrhea). If this does not work then I go back on chemo (although a different one).
The drug doesn't have a name but has a code of GSk1363089 (XL880) - administered orally to subjects with metastatic gastric cancer. It is designed to inhibit the growth of blood vessels in tumors. It is hoped that by limiting the tumor's blood supply, we can limit the growth of the cancer cells. It is not approved by the FDA.
So that's it. I have to take this drug once a day for 2 months. They say it will have limited side affects (mainly tiredness and diarrhea). If this does not work then I go back on chemo (although a different one).
One Year Later...
I just realized that today is my first anniversary of my cancer diagnosis. I remember it as if it was only a few days ago - very vividly. Things like this you really don't forget.
Now I'm headed to my oncologist to discuss my treatment options.... stay tuned.
Now I'm headed to my oncologist to discuss my treatment options.... stay tuned.
Thanks For The Emails
I've gotten emails from a lot of you and just wanted to say thanks.
I don't think I'll be able to reply to any of them soon just because I don't want to think about my situation a whole lot.
I've got a doctor's appointment later today to discuss my options for treatment. I guess I'll take it from there and post results after.
In the mean time, have a look at my trip pictures over the weekend at Niagra Falls...
I don't think I'll be able to reply to any of them soon just because I don't want to think about my situation a whole lot.
I've got a doctor's appointment later today to discuss my options for treatment. I guess I'll take it from there and post results after.
In the mean time, have a look at my trip pictures over the weekend at Niagra Falls...
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
The "BIG Talk"
So today is my chemo/doctor's appointment.
Me and my oncologist (with my family) went over my PET/CT scan results from last Thursday. I'm sorry to say that the results were not good. According to the scans, the tumors have grown to be highly visible on the PET with two definite spots on my liver. The really surprising thing is that a couple of small spots also showed up around the "plural lining of my lung" (I could be mis-quoting my doc). In short, the cancer has grown and spread. I'm "officially incurable" at this point, he added. Surgery and radiation are no longer options for me (because the cancer has spread). More chemo and clinical trials are whats next for me. He'll be changing my chemo from Taxotere since that didn't seem to have any affect on the tumor, although he doesn't know what it'll be yet. He'll present my case at his "tumor group" with other doctors next week to get some recommendations and I'll have a meeting with him next Thursday to go over my options.
How do I feel? I feel relatively calm considering the news. I've prepared myself very well, I think, but never thought of it going anywhere else but my liver. So yeah, that sucks. I've thought about it (receiving bad news) a lot for some weeks, actually, so its not totally unexpected. But I guess now it's reality for me and I'll just have to deal with it.
I didn't have chemo today (doctor recommended) and instead went back to work - I gotta keep my mind on something else.
Boy, now I'm really glad I bought that new bike.
Me and my oncologist (with my family) went over my PET/CT scan results from last Thursday. I'm sorry to say that the results were not good. According to the scans, the tumors have grown to be highly visible on the PET with two definite spots on my liver. The really surprising thing is that a couple of small spots also showed up around the "plural lining of my lung" (I could be mis-quoting my doc). In short, the cancer has grown and spread. I'm "officially incurable" at this point, he added. Surgery and radiation are no longer options for me (because the cancer has spread). More chemo and clinical trials are whats next for me. He'll be changing my chemo from Taxotere since that didn't seem to have any affect on the tumor, although he doesn't know what it'll be yet. He'll present my case at his "tumor group" with other doctors next week to get some recommendations and I'll have a meeting with him next Thursday to go over my options.
How do I feel? I feel relatively calm considering the news. I've prepared myself very well, I think, but never thought of it going anywhere else but my liver. So yeah, that sucks. I've thought about it (receiving bad news) a lot for some weeks, actually, so its not totally unexpected. But I guess now it's reality for me and I'll just have to deal with it.
I didn't have chemo today (doctor recommended) and instead went back to work - I gotta keep my mind on something else.
Boy, now I'm really glad I bought that new bike.
Friday, August 8, 2008
Another PET/CT Scan
Had a PET/CT scan yesterday. I'm refusing to know the results until my next chemo round (which will be next Tuesday). I wouldn't want to potentially ruin my weekend....
It was routine as usual, although the wait was much longer than I anticipated.
It was routine as usual, although the wait was much longer than I anticipated.
Saturday, August 2, 2008
Bike Pix
Here's a few pix of my new bike...
Some mods I've put in:
1. H.I.D. Headlight 8000K temp
2. Puig Smoked Windscreen (I still got the plastic covering on it)
3. Shogun Frame Sliders
4. Stompgrips (Tank Grips)
5. SpeedoHealer from HealTech
6. Carbon Fiber Stickers on: Gauges, Gas tank cover, Tank
7. Rear Fender Eliminator (D.I.Y)
8. Pazzo 'Shorty' Racing Levers (navy blue w/ red adjusters)
9. GPS mount
10. Blind spot mirrors
Next upgrade would be a new exhaust...
Some mods I've put in:
1. H.I.D. Headlight 8000K temp
2. Puig Smoked Windscreen (I still got the plastic covering on it)
3. Shogun Frame Sliders
4. Stompgrips (Tank Grips)
5. SpeedoHealer from HealTech
6. Carbon Fiber Stickers on: Gauges, Gas tank cover, Tank
7. Rear Fender Eliminator (D.I.Y)
8. Pazzo 'Shorty' Racing Levers (navy blue w/ red adjusters)
9. GPS mount
10. Blind spot mirrors
Next upgrade would be a new exhaust...
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
Another Round Of Chemo
Just had another dose of chemo this morning....everything went quite normal except that I was quite nauseated even before the chemo started. Afterwards, I was drowsy as normal (from the benadryl). I had to take the day off from work today (also did the same yesterday) since I'm not feeling that well.
I spoke to the people at the doctor's office regarding my next PET/CT scan - they said they'll get back to me soon. I was supposed to have it two weeks ago and now I'm feeling kinda anxious.
Did you feel the quake this morning? I sure did! I was sitting in the chemo lounge getting chemo when it happened.
I spoke to the people at the doctor's office regarding my next PET/CT scan - they said they'll get back to me soon. I was supposed to have it two weeks ago and now I'm feeling kinda anxious.
Did you feel the quake this morning? I sure did! I was sitting in the chemo lounge getting chemo when it happened.
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